Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall....

Hi Coffee-O,

You know what I went to the Laundry department today and I heard something that I've not heard in a long time. One short, stout and irritating member of this organisation called one particular lady "Ah Moi". And he has been doing that for sometime now its just that I've not heard him for a while and I thought he had gotten over that phase and stopped embarrasing that poor lady. By golly.... if it was me I would smack him on the head......first of all....its sort of a racial slur....who calls anybody Ah Moi anymore? ...tangachi and Aminah.....all terms used in times bygone to refer to ladies of the 3 main races in Malaysia.

What erks me is that he himself is short and stout and what if we call him Humpty Dumpty....how would that make him feel?Anyway i think i'll soon push Humpty off the wall. First of all, he is irritating....an over-confident loud mouth and a clanging bell, and secondly he doesn't leave his greens at home when he comes to work.....brings them along. Maybe he's delusional and thinks he works for a nursery.

Anyway, I've got an idea ......let's push Humpty Dumpty off the wall and let his greens save him. Gosh.....some people are born to irritate others and in their absence, their plants carry on the legacy for them. Why isn't anybody carrying on my legacy.....who's going to blog in my absence?
Opps....i hope Humpty's plants aren't reading this blog from wherever they're hanging from. Anyway good if they read....maybe they'll die from grief.













Missy Red now turned green

Can we be honest here?

How many times have we ladies attempt to tell our husbands or boyfriends a random story hoping that they would catch the hint behind the story.

Why do we take our husbands on a ride that is sometimes long and seems like it will never stop... going through one or two pit stops and sometimes even a stop at the toilet (to wet our eyes with eyemo for some fake tears)?

The longer the drive is, the better! The drive could last for a day or even a month!

If it's a short drive then there is no fun at all. If we ladies bring you on a short drive then we are being too 'direct' - it's akin to you asking us to drive into a tree!

Let's see if you can identify the long and short distance drive.

Scenario: Your lady has an urge to buy a pair of Choos

Drive 1:

She calls you up at the office asking what you had for lunch then reminds you that she'll be cooking your favorite dish tonight. Then she gives you a great big hug the moment you step out of the car, remembering to bath and spray on Happy perfume on her wrist, her neck, and all the right spots on her body and even her hair!

Then she tells you how her best friend's husband got her a surprise of this and that and the list goes on and on from year 1990 when they were dating till 2005 when they got their fourth child and now when she got her womb removed. The story was told all throughout dinner. Even while watching TV later on, with a plate of sliced oranges on your lap, the story continues.

Finally when you are about to doze off just before the first snore, she whispers in your ears "There's a sale on tomorrow at Jimmy Choo".

Drive 2:

She looks at you and you saw her eyes wide, big and sparkly. Waiting in excitement just to speak into your heart. When you are standing just at the right distance -3.1cm away from the bridge of her nose, she drops the good news to you!

"Darling! There's a sale tomorrow at Jimmy Choo!!" (Jumps up and down and probably steps on your baby-toe too) . So how much credit is left on your card (Big shinny eyes blinking 10 times per second). Mine is busted. Then you give her THE LOOK and she goes Darlingggggggggggggggg (till the small hairs on your hands stand in one accord to the sound of the ever famous high-pitched-sing-song-tune) Can lar darlingggggggggggg (swings your arms like how your colleagues at work teased you when the boss did the exact swiminging motions with you the other day!) And finally you gave in...and hands over your card.

Yeay!! ( she continues jumping up and down in front of you kissing ... the CARD!) Darlinggggggggg you are the best!

So what's the verdict dear husbands and boyfriends? which do you (actually) prefer?

My advise to you is. Don't be a goblok - listen carefully to allllllllll our stories and think. Get the hint!

The tale of a girl Donkey

whoa! I likeeeeeeeeeee your recent post MissyRed!

And talking about donkeys here's a story about Ms. Donky to cool you off...


One day while serving this nice looking young couple, this waiter noticed something very funny about how this guy addressed his girl.

Each time the waiter ask the guy a question, he would turn to his girl and call her "Donky!, What would you like to eat"

"Donky!, What would you like to drink?"
"You sure you don't want the shrimps Donky?"!

The waiter was curious whether if Donky was her pet name or his affectionate name for her. It sure didn't sound as loving as it should.

Donky reminded the waiter of a four legged short pony like creature with big teeth that needed a thousand sprays of Febreeze on it! But hey, people out there are calling their baby-s, darling-s, honey-pies.. Dear! (which also sounds like deer if you get what I mean.. pet.. deer..)

The waiter then decided to ask the guy, "Sorry sir for being so forward, but I noticed you calling your partner Donky. Why is that sir?".

Then the lady butted in saying..
"He-hor! always like that wan you know"
"He-hor! never call me properly wan you know"
"He-hor ....

Then the waiter said "Oh oh now I understand"
and quickly walked away with their orders.

Head or no head...what does it matter?

x4%#%&$$%#$.......i am truly pissed. Guess what.....what's a head of team for when the blasted person can't even do a simple job as to reply an enquiry email. I noticed any shit gets passed down to me....what am i a glorified "odd job worker" in this company? What the hell does he do then, if everything gets passed down to me? If he dies tomorrow also.....the job can still go on becos he's not the one doing it. (I AM)

Oh gosh and these people get promoted. I think I totally missed it......what have they done that deserves promotion? Or is this the way to go in today's organisation? Get a donkey to carry all the burdens and lead him to the finish line .....then once you are there....kick the ass out of the way and get the credit for carrying the burden to the finish line.........WAHHHHHHHHH........I GOT IT!

THIS IS the secret of today's career progression! Who cares a darn for hard and sincere work anymore? (especially when they can get donkeys like me to do the "donkey jobs")

Anyone beg to defer?

I better be up for promotion if not I'll blow my top so hard ......my brains will be all over this darn company!


Missy Red turned red

Grabbing the bull by its horns

Yeah talking about reputation, those in the customer service line should really take their jobs seriously. Especially those at this moneyhouse I go to.They should grab the bull by its horns… really! No wonder they are losing customers.

The first time I was there, I waited for close to thirty minutes before my number was called. I was shocked beyond south of Johor – that was because I was at their main branch. Got me wondering how long I needed to wait if I were at their smaller branches.

O dang – there goes the telephone again…pls hold on...

………….

That call wasn’t for me! Don’t they get it…there is no receptionist here…no lady picking up the phone just to transfer calls or pass messages for you..nada.. There’s a staff directory somewhere out there!

Where was I.. hmm yes then my next visit, I wanted them to link my accounts into one card. They gave me another new card. Imagine going to the ATM with two cards! How smart?!So, I told them that I needed just one card. But the new card was ready. So now there’s WASTAGE. One new shinny flashy red card gone to waste!

Now fast forward to today. I went to collect my new AhLong card.
First they said: Oh come back tomorrow to get it. Just need one day to do it.
Wow I was impressed - only one day?okay ... guess they are trying real hard to push these AhLong cards into the market. That's good!

The next day they said "I'm sorry miss, the card is not ready. Can we sms and let you know when the card is ready". Boy was I not surprised!

So I waited for the sms. Three days later I decided to pay a visit just to see if the card's ready. Well, didn't they only needed one day to do it. I gave them three more days! In total four days.

"Hi, is my card ready"
check,check,checkingggg...
"Oh miss, we have couried the card to your home"

"What?"

Being shocked beyond Geylang now, I told them to stop whatever they we doing to send it to my house! "I had indicated twice that I wanted to collect the card from here".

And there was silence ...

"Miss, we will inform you via sms once the card has arrived"

One week later, I got a note from PosLaju saying that I had missed the postman and to personally collect the package from PJ! How smart? I stay in KL! and I can't send a representative too and they open till? 6.30pm! now that should be easy but hmm I work in KL too!!

ah but Heaven's door opened when I saw this" Call XXXXX to arrange for the next delivery". And so I called.
"Sorry Miss, you'll have to contact that AhLong because it's an AhLong's card. We can't change the address".

Oh great, I have to make a visit to the AhLong.

And so I did. Again.
"Hi, I need you to call PosLaju to resend it to this place. They won't allow me to change the delivery address"

"Oh Miss, we'll have to wait for them to do the second round of delivery and if there's no one at home again they'll resend it to us"
(Now thinking in my heart ..doink of course there won't be anyone at home! That was why I wanted to come collect it here.. "geleng-geleng" my head)

"And when is that?" I calmly asked.

" Oh I'm not sure Miss".
"Then can you pls call PosLaju to resend it rather than wait"

"OK miss, I'll just fill up this form for you".

"I have filled up that form before". (shakes head)

"It's ok miss, I just need o fill this form up. Sign here pls".

"Ok thanks". BUT no thank you for your service.

eee how not to be geram you tell me!

I didn't want to lose my cool as I had a reputation to maintain.

What about them?

Coffee O

Real Life "Bull In A China Shop"

Coffee-O,



I got to share this story with you. I went for an outdoor survival stint with a "group of people" and guess what I met, for the first time in my life, a real life "bull in a china shop". We had this activity where the group was broken up into smaller teams and we had to get stuff that the facilitator called out.....the snag is....you can steal the stuff from the other teams if you did not have them in your own team....even if it was right out of the hand of your opponent. And by golly..... I saw this particular lady bulldoze another team .....and i mean physically..... to get the stuff out of another team member's hand. They tumbled to the ground and the "victim" hit her head on the stack of chairs that lined the hall and the "bull" was lying on top of the victim pinning her to the ground until she got the stuff out of the "victim's" hand.



The moral of the story is - it's not worth getting hated, bearing dagger stares from other people and placing your reputation on the line for a mere five ringgit bill. Anyway, we being nice, pleasant and peace loving Malaysians couldn't help but let our jaws drop open at the sight.

Broomstick & Japanese

aiyoyo!

MissyRed, you should give your hubby a wack on the head.

You know you got to use a broomstick for that .. I once saw it on a Hong Kong movie.

The story goes like that... everyday this old lady would watch soap operas on her TV. Then one day her TV wouldn’t work… so being a professional TV-watcher she quickly got to her feet, grabbed a broom stick and started hitting the TV’s while shouting angrily at it – I had thought it was vulgar words she used.. but upon listening closely she gave the TV what it could understand ! Japanese profanities !! “TOSHIBA!!!MITSUBISHI! HITACHI!!! BANZAI!!” hahaha!

oh wait.. phone call coming in - what the!!! am I the company's receptionist now!